He considered self-marketing inappropriate. It didn’t seem authentic to him and, in his words, “had the smell of manipulation.” That’s what a client told me in a coaching session when I encouraged him to take greater control over how others perceived him. My reply: “But Mr Müller (name changed), you’ve been doing self-marketing continuously for the past half hour!”
Peter Näf
Zurich, January 2026
He looked at me in disbelief and protested. How did I arrive at that conclusion?
Mr Müller had come to me for leadership coaching, among other things to learn how to appear more assertive. We had arranged an appointment for 10 a.m. in my office. Since the front door remains open during business hours, my clients usually enter the building without ringing – and suddenly appear in my doorway.
You are constantly being “captured”
Mr Müller arrived a few minutes early and approached quietly, so I didn’t hear him coming down the corridor. I was deeply absorbed in my work and momentarily startled when he suddenly appeared in the doorway. He apologised profusely and asked, in a slightly submissive tone, whether he might come in. His whole posture radiated insecurity: he made himself small, tilted his head forward and looked over his glasses – speaking softly and politely.
That image imprinted itself in my memory like a photograph. Even three years later, I can recall it vividly. Why? Because his reaction surprised me – after all, we had an appointment, and being a few minutes early is hardly a crime. The scene stuck with me because it made one thing crystal clear: self-marketing doesn’t start when we consciously use it.
Self-marketing is constant
So, what does this episode have to do with self-marketing? Precisely that is what good self-marketing achieves: it plants images in other people’s minds – unconsciously and unavoidably. Every well-told story automatically evokes inner pictures in the listener’s imagination. Skilled advertisers, politicians, and filmmakers use this effect deliberately. One famous film scene even influenced an entire generation’s showering habits – if you’re over 50 and enjoy films, your inner cinema is probably running right now.
But it isn’t only stories that leave impressions. Our everyday behaviour sends images too – directly to the eyes of those around us. Our minds don’t distinguish through which lens these impressions reach us. So why leave them to chance instead of shaping them consciously?
Good self-marketing conveys authentic impressions – aspects of ourselves that others might not otherwise see in everyday interaction. I, for one, was grateful to discover through my client’s storytelling that behind his initial hesitancy stood a resilient, persistent, and highly talented professional with an impressive track record of success.
In the words of Paul Watzlawick: we cannot not communicate – and by extension, we cannot not do self-marketing. So be mindful not only on social media, but also in daily life, of the images of yourself that circulate in the world.